Excuse me, you’re standing in my pluton…
August 17th, 2006 by Atomictumor
So, the great answer to the great question of WHAT IS A PLANET is….
Now, the verdict isn’t in, as the International Astronomical Union still has to vote on the proposal, but it appears that the group, not unlike the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences, likes to hedge its bets and only submit proposals that are bound to get the necessary two thirds vote.Â
Now, the workaround itself is going to be that yes, the contested celestial bodies are going to be planets, but they’re going to be a Kato Kaelin version of planet called Pluton.
So, in the great scheme of things, this is how it works from little to big:
- Quark
- Atomic component (proton, neutron, Iraqi WMD, etc)
- Atom
- Molecule
- Crumb
- AT’s bank account (OR US foreign credibility, for the intellectuals out there…)
- Bison Frise
- Breadbox
- Luxembourg
- Hatchback
- Plot holes in M Night Shyamalan’s The Village
- A department store
- Star Jones (oh snap… wait, Star Jones fat jokes are wa-hay 2005…)
- Her ego (s’better)
- Oak Ridge
- Godzirra
- The Great Lakes
- Australia
- NSA budget (shhh, its a secret… btw, did you know they can file a secret patent? Creepy, huh?)
- The Atlantic Ocean
- How much I love my wife (awwwww)
- Earth’s Moon
- Plutons
- Planets
- Stars (betcha thought I was going to make another one of those jokes…)
- Galaxies
- That stupid rose from the Dark Tower. Seriously, did that ending suck, or what?
August 18th, 2006 at 10:02 am
I had to reread the entire series every time he released another book. It got old and I never made it to the end. Seems I stopped somewhere around a suicidal monorail.
August 18th, 2006 at 1:45 pm
Due to the new classification there is now a “planet” between mars and jupiter, and that’s just nonsense. Anything that relatively close that can’t be seen quickly and clearly in the night sky with the unaided eye shouldn’t be considered a planet. Therefore I am thinking that a subclassification should probably exist. Eight planets and four something elses. But’s whats in a name? Small planet, planet, and big planet would work. Jupiter is 10 times wider than earth, and yet it is called a planet when it is more of a failed star. Earth is five times wider than Pluto and four times wider than the Moon. [wikipedia]
The astronomer’s primary issue with this is “how big does a lump of rock have to be before it becomes a planet?” Well, I’m just not that concerned, sorry. However, under their new classification system I think Mt. Everest has enough mass to form a planet. I would not consider it or Pluto a planet. Anything smaller than the moon shall henceforth be known to me as a Copernican Moon. Screw the IAU. There are eight planets and four Moopernicans or Moonons, whatever.
The ending to the Dark Tower was just as it should have been… It was just like the rest of the book, where afterward I said to myself that I should have seen that coming. Sure it wasn’t amazing, but what the hell else did you expect to happen? And wasn’t it a turtle’s back, not the rose?
August 18th, 2006 at 2:46 pm
Stick it to em, man. Damn right.
Freakin scientist.
August 18th, 2006 at 3:32 pm
“Freakin scientist.”
Hey! I resemble that remark!
August 23rd, 2006 at 10:10 pm
EIGHT PLANETS told you so. neener. alright, they didn’t go for moopernicans, yet.
August 24th, 2006 at 8:15 am
Does that mean we can buy pluto now? Do we still have to capitalize it?