“Everybody’s reaction is changing you…”

November 10th, 2006 by Atomictumor

More songs for the title.  A shiny sixpence for who (ahem, Allisone) can first tell me where this is from.  Actually, I don’t know what a sixpence look like.  It might not exist.  I’d wiki it, but I only have a few minutes to do it before the 3 PM show.

Guys, I’m going to suck it up, and talk to you like I was talking to Bos in the parking lot on the roof a few minutes ago, in the sun and the heat.

Its not easy to talk about God and stuff (notice I always add the stuff and whatnot and stuff?).  I’m not going to worship the same one you might.  I’m going to love and respect the one that shows me the beauty. The one that I understand is behind all this pain, but the one that I believe will see her through it, and will, if nothing else, leave me with a sense of awe that I’ll have forever.

Now, I feel bad.  Almost embarassed, because smart people like GAC, and many others, whom I still respect and admire with great vigor (old pedantic hippy friends of ours, for instance) have agreed with me for so long that the answers are all in science.

And they are, they totally are.  We evolved from monkeys, I have no doubt.  Well, not monkeys, exactly, but the same Viking that may have sired Bos’s line and my line.  Us and monkeys have a common ancestor.  Well, not a viking.  Dammit, you know what I’m saying?

What?  You don’t?  Well, just listen to the music, and enjoy it.  You don’t have to understand.

I cited a little while ago my post about Aw Geez, Go Away Infinity.  I can’t link to it, because for some reason the old cached, static posts are redirecting to here, and I’ll have Johnny fix that another day.  Theres plenty of time.  The post probably wasn’t even about what I remember it being about.

Anyway, the point of it is, and a bone of contention of mine for so long has been.

  1. If something is infinite, then there can’t be anything outside it (infinity plus one is irrelavent, and doesn’t exist.  Its like asking for the weight of a sideways.)
  2. If something is infinite, then everything, the beer bottle, the ring, the sweet little girl in bed, me, you, them, it is part of the infinity.  It can’t be outside it.
  3. If you have a consciousness, then that would make you God.  Because you are the thought of that one infinity.
  4. Therefore, because I’m not naive enough to assume that you are all figments of my imagination, there can’t be an infinite god.
  5. Therefore, ha ha, I’m right.

That was my thinking two weeks ago.  And the thing is, its damn valid, except now, I see the difference.

See, all of the atoms in our body change, I think like every 7 years or something.  Not like a snake, a constant thing, but in 7 years, you are composed of something completely different.  You’re borrowing your body.

What makes you you?  Where’s the soul?

Wow, this is rambly.

Jack White is now telling me the crickets and the ants get it.  At the perfect time.

It makes so much sense.

Hmmm…. it looks crazy, doesn’t it?  And I won’t get it later.  I do now.  I wish I could show it to you, because its pretty cool.

Its not worth my wife being in that bed for, but the fact that the window was open, and the sun was shining right on her sweet face at 1, well, that was cool.

Systolically, she’s still doing fine.  She’s asleep.

As I sung Apple Blossom to her, her head moved.  My brain says “reflex”.  My heart says “hi baby”.  My soul says “I get it.”
Yeah.

I love you, baby.

17 Responses to ““Everybody’s reaction is changing you…””



  1. maman Says:

    That is wonderful that she reacted to your singing! Please make sure you touch her and talk directly to her… not just about her. At one point my brother was having problems… It really made a huge difference. Hang in there!

  2. Joel Says:

    “Old pedantic hippie friends.” Please.

  3. meice Says:

    I used make up Mix CD’s and set them to repeat while playing RPGs on the playstation. When I hear the songs on the radio that I burned into my brain, I think back to specific battles. Music is weird like that. It draws out memories and stirs up emotion.

  4. Vicky Says:

    Hey. I just got here (from ClubMom) and I’ve been reading for a good hour. Thank YOU.

    I’ve pushed and rearranged and moved some clutter to another corner. And I’ve made some room for GAC and you and your family in my heart and in my mind. I’ll be back.

  5. jenwright Says:

    The Stripes, baby!

  6. jenwright Says:

    Where’s my shiny sixpense?

  7. Joel Says:

    http://www.tclayton.demon.co.uk/pics/c2/6d74o.jpg

  8. The Bosphorus Says:

    The vikings looted that sixpence.

    Infinite…I don’t like that word. It’s tricky. It’s like those passenger side mirrors that make objects appear closer than they are. It distorts, or rather it limits what you’re talking about (ironic). That’s the trouble w/ language. Language is a finger pointing at the moon, to use a zen phrase. Is God infinite? Yes, but…

    Obviously, your post indicates you’re past the infinite conundrum, but this gets us back to what we were talking about last night. It’s mighty close to boxing things in. You can put a flower in a book, dry and catalog the flower, but when you open the book again in the winter, the flower is not what you found growing in the field. Where did the flower go?

  9. The Bosphorus Says:

    A relative of yours, Joel?

  10. Joel Says:

    No, silly. It’s a picture of a shiny sixpence. For jenwright.

  11. califdudes Says:

    Hey AT,

    You stir the imagintion of my spritual soul, what you say I have thought in the same, yet differnt terms many times in my life. It has always been very hard for me to wrap my extremelty scientific mind around my faith. Just two months ago, my son now 20, in college and studying anthropology (dam schools) said to me “How can you deny the science?” I said I don’t. He said “Then how can you believe they way you do?” And I said…because I can.

    You talk alot about music and I so when I got a new CD yesterday and listened to it today, for some reason all the songs made me think about you and your situation. I am strange in my music tastes(all over the board, the shipment yesterday included Led Zeppelin, Pablo Cruise, Carrie Underwood, Celtic Women and, the point of this rambling, Los Lonely Boys. I know I am strange). I don’t know if you like Santana, but they remind me of that sound. At any rate, if you get the chance you should listen to the album Sacred. All the lyrics seemed to be written for you as I heard them this morning, but this post brought to mind the lyrics: “Don’t tell me how to live my life-Don’t tell me how to pray-Don’t tell me how to sing my song-Dont’ tell me what to say-Cause I believe that miracles-Happen every day.

    I don’t think Faith is a set thing or a set philosophy. I think its an emotion. And emotions are always what the person who is feeling them thinks they are, not open to interreptation by the outside world, but personal and individual.

    Just my thought. Some day when things are better for you I will tell you the story of how faith not only got me through that g-baby thing, but the 3x near death of my son (only 2 months after her birth)…from flesh eating bacteria. Its a wonder I am still standing.

  12. Atomictumor Says:

    Thank you, Joel!

  13. Allisone Says:

    Aw man, I was at Target (shout out to BM - ha ha).
    I was however, totally listening to the White Stripes with the sunroof open. Does that at least get me a picture of a sixpence? I know Jen beat me to it.
    My 12 year old and I were singing at the top of our lungs. Yeah, I’m the cool Mom.

  14. daco Says:

    AT, while you are pondering the infinite universe that includes a God in there somewhere…please explain faith to me. What is that “faith” stuff all about?
    (Tongue planted firmly in cheek)

  15. jenwright Says:

    The only reason I know the Stripes is b/c AT introduced them to us. So I kinda cheated.

  16. Aunt Nun Says:

    If you take the whole city of Chattanooga and everyone in it; remove all the spaces from between all the parts in all the atoms, you’d have a very dense particle smaller in size than a grain of sand. We’re made mostly of space - the energy that holds everything together and circling around. I wonder if that’s not God in us.?. I can’t do faith in God without science or vice versa. So… we’re made mostly of the Spirit of God. You and me and the tree outside are not really as separate as we think. So there are no enemies, really… There’s no need to fear… It’s all good…

  17. Atomictumor Says:

    YES!