December 23rd, 2006 by Atomictumor
And my patience is shot.
I came back, the bedroom and playroom were a mess, and I couldn’t find the damn USB connector to upload the movie that I was able to take of the kids seeing the bunkbed and computer for the first time. The movie cut itself off after a minute because evidently the son of a bitchin memory stick ran off with the damn USB connector to have forbidden love somewhere out of my reach, so I had to make do with the 8 MB relic that came with the camera.
After that, I cussed at MastaG’s computer because the wireless adapter wasn’t loading the right way (fixed it by loading the MB’s ethernet drivers first), and then I cussed like a friggin sailor at Pigpen’s Terrordactl playset because OH MY GOD you need a degree to figure out Hot Wheel’s easy to use instructions.
When I was tucking the kids in, I tried like hell to get a lamp plugged into the ‘childproof’ electrical socket cover in their bedroom, and then yelled at G when he said “here, let me try it”. Geez kid, this falls under the ‘if I can’t do it’ category…
I apologized, tucked them in with kisses, said prayers, and walked back into the trashed bedroom and playroom. Then I tried like hell to get into the Christmas spirit.
I never really do any other year, I’m not sure why I care if I do or not this year.
—
In better news, Sumgurl left a beautiful gift of Thomas Creek in the front seat of the Volvo, and some nice people from Eave’s work have put together a food basket and some gifts for the kids. Its hard to be angry and not feel like an ass in the face of generosity, but I think I’ll manage…
Hee.
—
On the way home, I spent the whole drive thinking about how the hell a 28 yr old father of 2 in a committed and very loving relationship for 10 years to his first real love is supposed to get back onto the market.
And why do I think thats a good idea?
Ah well. I guess nobody should be lonely at Christmas. Lets all have a wee little pity party for AT.
—
All things considered, its nice to be home.
Mazel Tov, bitches.
December 23rd, 2006 at 9:40 pm
And a Merry Christmas to you too, bitches. :) Its hard for me to get into the spirit too - its so dang much work to do as a parent every. friggin. year. *sigh* Now off to wrap 300 presents. I hate wrapping too. Bah. lol
December 23rd, 2006 at 9:41 pm
Mazel tov back atcha, goy.
December 23rd, 2006 at 10:27 pm
Eggnog helps and about the dating thing….it sucks, you’ll hate it and then it will happen to all work out. Take your time and drink some more eggnog! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
December 23rd, 2006 at 10:30 pm
It doesn’t matter about the movie as long as you saw the look on your children’s faces….
You will know when the time is right for the “market”. Just like you “knew” with BJ.
Miracles do happen more than once.
December 23rd, 2006 at 11:06 pm
Merry Christmas to you and your boys. I was going to write, Scrooge but I didn’t think you would get my humor.
No one knows what you are feeling, even if they experienced the same loss/pain. You will know when the time is right for hitting the market. However, my guess is that Lady will have one hell of a time coming up behind your beloved BJ.
It’s hard for a woman to live in the shadow of the perfect woman!
Glad you made it home safely.
Merry Christmas!
December 23rd, 2006 at 11:30 pm
No advice ‘cept- follow your gut.
Thoughts daily for you and yours-
Happy Holidays-
Kyle
December 24th, 2006 at 12:50 am
Hang in there AT… turn off the old thinker, and try to ‘enjoy’ (not really the right word) this Christmas through the eyes of your sweet boys. *big Christmas hug* and a prayer for BJ and your higher power to hold you close right now…
December 24th, 2006 at 1:26 am
The “market” definitely sucks. Don’t give it serious thought for at least 1 year.
December 24th, 2006 at 5:40 am
Gotta love MastaG; my kids figured out the childproof stuff way early on.
Our version of the seat belt childproof cap was duct tape — she could undo the childproof thingy, but wasn’t strong enough to push through the duct tape.
That one’s driving now; beware the silver explorer with an ACES dinosaur sticker on the back.
December 24th, 2006 at 8:59 am
Ha Bum Hug.
It wouldn’t be the “season” without lost things and a bit of cursing “The Christmas Story” Style!
December 24th, 2006 at 11:15 am
AT - After my extremely painful divorce (married since college - for 13 years - 3 kids), I couldn’t imagine how in the world I would ever manage to go on a date again, much less actually have a relationship. I couldn’t even remember how that whole thing worked.
It was a long, slow process with tentative baby steps along the way.
It will happen when you are ready and the time is right. And although I did not know BJ, she sounds like the kind of person who would have wanted you to love and be loved again one day.
Don’t let anyone else tell you when you are or are not ready. Everyone is different.
:-)
Katie
December 24th, 2006 at 2:55 pm
get through christmas first, then worry about the market.
December 24th, 2006 at 2:56 pm
oh and your welcome - don’t spend it all in one place ;)