October 9th, 2007 by Atomictumor
Are freakin awesome.
I’ve dabbled in computer games over the years, normally the kind where my French army (because the French army is always awesome) is trying to like obliterate the Apache nation or something like that, with some little disembodied head popping up every once in a while saying “Wow, AT, you suck. Would you like to run the tutorial?”
It wasn’t always this way.
I came of age in the second great wave of video game consoles, with the olde skool NES coming out when I was in 5th grade.
Man, I wanted that mother. I wanted that thing so bad I could taste it. My friends with money got it when it first came out, and I’d go over to their house and rock some Super Mario Brothers, or Jackal, or Contra (I’m steeped in the uuddlrlrbastart business), and then go home to my old busted up Atari 800. Now, the Atari rocked in its day, which was 1982, but this was 1987, man, and I was needing some NES.
I ended up going in with my sisters and buying one. My lifes ambition was now complete.
And then I discovered that I can be a compulsive gamer. When I wasn’t playing the thing, I was drawing little pictures of Mario, or closing my eyes and jumping over mushrooms. When I got home, I snuck in the NES time, being all sneaky about it so that my folks would think I was playing for the allowed hour, instead of the not allowed all day.
I got a Super Nintendo for my birthday a few years later, and the process began anew.
Lemme tell you something about me and games too… did I mention the world ‘compulsive’? I might not be using it in the fully understood and correct sense of the word, what I mean is that when I’m playing the game, I really don’t look like I’m having a good time, on account of all the cussing and yelling that I tend to do. The ratio of “you stupid f—ing son of a bitchin diggidy damned piss off mother f—er of a game” vs the “hell yeahs” are fully 5:1, on a good day. Some days, well, some days I’d tend to bang the controllers against the floor in a caffeine and sugar induced rage at the video game that just WON’T LET ME THROUGH THIS STUPID PART until something rattled and broke. I went through about 4 Super Nintendo controllers in my wrath.
So, once I grew up, had a kid, and straighted up, I no longer had the time or money to devote to these pastimes, so I gave up a bit.
I also discovered, unfortunately, that the older I got, well, the more I sucked at them. Its like some kind of weird reverse maturity, where my normally capable fingers just aren’t responding to my brain quite fast enough to dodge that freakin tank, or jump over that turtle shell.
So, now, I have an Xbox 360, fully on top of the console world, and lemme tell you people, it is sweet. It is good stuff. When I get to play it. See, because those boys of mine, man, they say they’re just doing it for an hour, but I don’t know…
October 9th, 2007 at 4:12 pm
You might be surprised, but I love video games. I’m not compulsive like you, but I could be. I’ve got a Nintendo DS Lite right now and I’m really trying to talk my beau into buying me a Wii. They are so fun! They’re not the best for what it sounds like you like to play, but it’d be super awesome for me.
October 9th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
Hmm… My husband is like that.
I don’t understand the whole dynamic. If it makes you mad, why do it?
October 9th, 2007 at 4:39 pm
OOohhh. I love the Wii!!
I also like the DS. I’m good at Cookin’ Mama.
I don’t know why I like that game. Like I don’t cook enough already… No dishes to wash I guess.
October 9th, 2007 at 5:38 pm
I got into some Grand Theft Auto and now I play WoW a bit but I used to be real into the NES and SNES. I could still go for some Super Mario Cart.
October 9th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
I love the Wario games. Have you seen them Jane? If not, go get one immediately.
October 9th, 2007 at 6:10 pm
Ohhh, the sweet killingness of Contra. I loved thee. Then the kids got older, I lost all gaming systems priviliedges and now I suck at the new games. Macdougal laughed until he cried the other night while trying to teach me Fusion Frenzy on XBox. I would not even go in the room when it was Halo time.
No worries AT, I am absolutely positive that your lovely, always well behaved boys are only playing for an hour. At a time. Or so.
October 9th, 2007 at 8:53 pm
The last and only video game console I had was the Atari 2600. I was a fetus. I kid, I kid.
I could play Haunted House and Combat pretty good. Circus and Frogger though… damn I loved those games!
Thinking about the Wii for the “family” for Christmas. My daughters are addicted to DDR and WoW.
October 9th, 2007 at 10:24 pm
Your family will LOVE the Wii!!
I think we downloaded a wario game for the Wii. But Isabella won’t let me play it.
sigh…
October 9th, 2007 at 11:34 pm
My wife and I are WoW addicts, although work doesn’t allow me much time for whacking dragons, killing horde, etc.
We bought the Wii a few months ago and have been having a freakin’ blast with it. My son, who is five, and I play tennis daily and despite the fact he hands my butt to me, I still manage to enjoy myself.
October 10th, 2007 at 6:40 am
Any of you guys remember pinball? Now that was a game. Flippers, little incandescent light bulbs flashing…none of those fancy LEDs, mechanical bells ringing.
For that matter…any of you remember what a quarter looks like?
October 10th, 2007 at 7:50 am
I remember pinball. It was expensive, lasted about three minutes, and then you went home to clean your room.
October 10th, 2007 at 10:09 am
Barley’s has a few good pinball games and we play about once a week. I LOVE pinball, too!
October 10th, 2007 at 10:27 am
I just remember that I suck at Pinball. Physics hates me.
October 10th, 2007 at 12:12 pm
I also am horrible at pinball.
There’s nothing like making those flippers wave spastically while the damn ball goes right. down. the. middle.
gaaahhh!!
October 12th, 2007 at 8:19 pm
Consoles are for the weak. Real gamers use PCs.
On the other hand, I am glad that you are enjoying your destruction-inducing frustration, AT