Atomictumor

So I was sitting around this morning, thinking about an audit thats going on and finalizing some wicked awesome plans for the weekend that weren’t really finalizing very well, and pondering on Bos’s truck difficulties, and my world domination difficulties, and the whole 5 year plan thing, and I think I came up with a mutually beneficial situation.

(Click to embiggen)

So yeah, it basically goes like this, we put together a satellite, and put Bos’s truck into orbit.  Once in orbit, the color will change from Purple to Red because of oxidation issues, and cosmic radiation.  It will also grow a front license plate.

Anyway, hook Bos’s truck up to the satellite, which will hereafter be called “Truck Dropping Satellite of Doom”.

As the name implies, the sat will be hooked up to a remote controller, which I will have in a certain safe place.  I will then be able to extort my way out of doing whatever I don’t want to do, by implying that I will drop a truck on them from orbit.

I don’t see a flaw in this.

Click… Click… Click…

Then, rrrr-rrrrrr-splutter.

Do that again and the truck finally cranks.

Whew.

Seems to me like the starter motor is kerputz. The Missus met me at Professional Honda Repair, which has changed its name, but I don’t remember the new one. It’s in Solway, if you’re wondering, and they do excellent work.

I’m irritated that I can’t fix it myself. I know I don’t have the time to putter around on it attempting to figure out what is really wrong, but I’d like to. I have this notion I could save myself money and hell, I’d have fixed it myself. Ah, well.

I just hope it’s the starter motor that is busted.

As we were driving home with the Biscuit and his pop (that’d be my grandfather), we were discussing how the nature of Punchbug has changed over time. from the early 80s when a drive was a constant scan to make sure you found the 5 punchbugs/mile before your sister did, to now where you are lucky to see one.

Which led us to discussing the rules.

Like how modern “New Beetles” don’t friggin count.  Now, Biscuit disagreed, but MastaG and I were adamant.  If you hit on a New Beetle, be prepared to get your ass kicked.

Which got me to thinking about the rules of Punchbug, which seem to differ.  Let me lay down how it works in Oak Ridge.

1. Classic Beetle gets one hit on the shoulder.  Should the hitter be mistaken, and hit on a New Beetle, or a Karman Ghia, or a cake cleverly disguised to be a Beetle, or a small child, or anything that isn’t a classic Beetle, the person hit may immediately take three retaliatory hits on the hitter, normally with a spoken phrase starting with “Hell no…”

2. The same Beetle may not be hit on twice during the same flow of movement.  If the Beetle is in traffic with you, and is called out as a Punchbug, it may not be hit on again.  Even if you’re behind it all the way to Alaska.  Now, if you were to stop in Omaha on the way to consider what a horrible wasteland of a place the town is, while the beetle moves ahead, but then stops in like Wyoming (don’t ask) and then you meet up with it again somewhere in British Columbia, the beetle is fair game.

Why?

Because the flow of movement was interrupted.

By the same token, if you go to the gas station and pass a parked Beetle, you may use it as a Punchbug on BOTH TRIPS, provided that the trip was interrupted by the engine stopping and somebody getting out of the car to pump gas or rob the place.

The punishment for double punching a punchbug, no matter who is the hitter and who is the hittie, is HITTIE’S CHOICE of three (3) shoulder punches, or one (1) charlie horse on the leg.

3. Thats about it.  Theres probably more, but I can’t remember, and MastaG disagreed with me on the flow of traffic situation, saying that after an hour a previously punched punchbug is fair game.

Respect the code.

The Vatican speaks out about driving.

The 10 commandments of driving

1. You shall not kill.
2. The road shall be for you a means of communion between people and not of mortal harm.
3. Courtesy, uprightness and prudence will help you deal with unforeseen events.
4. Be charitable and help your neighbour in need, especially victims of accidents.
5. Cars shall not be for you an expression of power and domination, and an occasion of sin.
6. Charitably convince the young and not so young not to drive when they are not in a fitting condition to do so.
7. Support the families of accident victims.
8. Bring guilty motorists and their victims together, at the appropriate time, so that they can undergo the liberating experience of forgiveness.
9. On the road, protect the more vulnerable party.
10. Feel responsible toward others.

There goes my Hummer, cf #5.

Last week one of my molars went bad. I thought, feared, a root canal was needed. What made the rotten situation worse is my insurance. Knox Co dropped the dental insurance we’ve carried for the past seven, eight years. Wouldn’t you know the new insurance we could afford doesn’t include my dentist. So off I go, hopped up on hydracodones, calling dental offices, searching for a new dentist. I found one and he told me all I probably need is a crown. That’s what I got. The dentist ground the tooth down (I got bits of it in my eye. Rock on!) The crown seems to have worked. There’s no more pain anyway.

Then, get this. The shifter on my truck hasn’t been engaging like I think it ought to over the past few weeks. First and second were the usually suspects, then fifth acted up. Yesterday the clutch starts behaving really spooky.  Driving home last night it started popping out of first and second when I’d engage the clutch. So I took it into the shop this morning and told them the clutch is acting funny. They called home later and told the Missus the clutch was at about total failure.

Woot. We get a new clutch.

There goes the Car and Home account money. But you know what? We’ve got the $$ to cover it and the tooth. That’s pretty good. What a blessing. Thank God.