Atomictumor

The tree doth explode
Spills Christmas into the room
Such strange traditions

No time to savor
But the needful is achieved.
And our jobs are done

BJ’s phone was stole
But they didn’t steal the bill
Three hundred dollars

My back door is fixed
And an offer has been made
Loose ends get tied up

Lady’s long work week
Dims her appreciation
That I’m off 4 days

Its Christmas Eve Eve
And these days are the good days
Unless you’re a tree

—

Happy Festivus!!!
I forgot it was today
Should make tonight fun…

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I see you are still the same
Its been a while

Weekend visitors
Made the house feel warm and big
Thanks for coming, sis

Big projects at work
The big xmas retail crunch
Weekends off are good

She walked through the room
Showed me her leg shaving wound
She has such cute legs.

AT’s cookin food
I’m gonna give this a try
We’ll see how it goes

Long week behind us
Retail at Christmas is nuts
Only fired one

Baked a yummy cake
Made carrots with marzipan
Got fingers stained green

Juicebox dressed fancy
Liked the girls in their dresses
Heartbreaker to come

G played the trombone
Wearing a Santa Claus hat
Holiday concert

Old house vandalized
Kids without supervision
Sad there’s no respect

Best night of the week
Saturday all to ourselves
Found the perfect tree

First tree in three years
At this house where we all live
Now it feels like home

Whats with these people?
Honking on the interstate
Angry at everyone

Their eyes are hollow
White knuckles on steering wheel
Strange obligations

Are they so empty?
Are their lives miserable?
What would be the point?

Was sitting outside
Minding my own business now
Sippin on Koolaid

Watchin’ world go by
And thinkin’ bout walruses
When a guy stepped up

He was a weird dude
Had a shiny silver suit
and big ass helmet

Too much gain on voice
Made it hard to hear his words
Like a bad P.A.

“SIR, DO YOU HAVE A
LUMINOUS BALL OF PLASMA”
is what he asked me

I sipped the Koolaid
And looked at this big weirdo
For bout a minute

Mulling my response
I finally replied “Yeah,
Sounds like the sun, chief”

He reached in his suit
And took out a maraca
Very colorful

Kicked over my drink
then rattled his maraca
And then walked away

I was all like “huh?”
But then eight minutes later
The sun went out.  Sucks.