Atomictumor

Got word yesterday afternoon that a water main had burst out at the library. The H2O was cut off, and I’ve got today off! I’d already scheduled leave for tomorrow, so what a surprise many vacation. Lugnut and I spent the morning playing trains, eating and watching the DVD, Bluegrass Journey.

This is an excelent dvd, much more so than I’d expected. Tim O’Brien said that Bluegrass is “kind of like folk music in overdrive.” He’s right. Watching these folks play is something different than simply listening to an audio recording. There’s something about seeing the fingerwork, sweat, and laughing that goes into the music. Makes me want to go a bluegrass festival.

A good bluegrass cd is still worth listening to, though. My father-in-law brought a copy of a Doc Watson cd to the North Carolina cabin where we vacationed. We listened to it there in the cabin and then all the way to the Emerald Mine in Hiddenite, N.C.

When l was a kid my family and l went to a couple small churches. We would go on Sunday mornings and Sunday evenings. Sometimes we would go on a Saturday night as well. If there was a revival going on at our church we’d even go during the week. Now, looking back, l’d say l went with a significant amount reluctance or perhaps with an ambiguous enthusiasm.

The songs, singing, and to a lesser extent, the raucus preaching made it worthwhile. Each service started the same way. The congregation called out page numbers from the hymnal for songs to sing. Then if it was a special evening we’d have somebody or a group of people singing. I always enjoyed most the folks that accompanied their singing with an instrument. It was usually a piano or an acoustic guitar that was played.

Listening to Doc evokes a certain nostalgic feeling which isn’t a surprise at all. He says as much about his music himself in the liner notes. Many of the songs cast, he says, “a little bit of nostalgic sadness.” For him, Doc Watson says it’s the memory of people who have taught him the songs. For myself, it’s a memory of a certain place and time less than any particular person. It’s these songs, the people’s tone of voice and the pace of the songs, that listening to Doc Watson and watching Bluegrass Journey brings to mind.

We decided to splurge today and take the kids to the theater.  I took MastaG to see Pirates of the Caribbean 2 while AT took Pigpen to see Cars.  Both movies were a big success, entertaining children and adults alike.
And once again I was reminded about how much I hate people.  There are certain characters that can be found at every movie theater in America.  I’m gonna break it down for you folks.

The Talker:  Everyone knows this asshole.  There’s not much to say about him, other than we all hate him.  Bastard.

The Reader:  This one is usually found only at foreign movies where subtitles are used, but if you stick around for the credits, you may encounter the Reader at any film, performing a running dialogue of make-up artists’ names and song titles.

The Explainer:  The Explainer is usually found in kids’ movies.  They assume that the child (or any person within hearing distance) is too stupid to understand what the hell they’re watching.

That One Guy who Wears Too Much Cologne:  Easy to sniff out and avoid, unless he gets there after you and traps you in your seat.  Beware his stench.

The Laugher:  Usually a dumpy woman in her mid-40’s, the Laugher finds everything funny.  While I’m sure that’s good for her blood pressure, it does shit all for mine.

The Late Asshole:  Some people cheat the system and time their entrance to avoid those pesky commercials and sometimes irritating previews, but the true Late Asshole wanders in well after the movie has actually started, and usually picks a seat right next to you.

The Parent Who Couldn’t be Arsed to Get a Babysitter:  Easily one of the most hated of all movie-goers, TPWCBATGAB constantly interupts the flow of the movie by taking their child in and out of the theater, threatening, cajoling, or ignoring their fussy baby or small child.  A swift kick to the nuts (or ovaries) is heartily advised, to ensure they do not have more children with which to interrupt future movie-going experiences.

The Parent with the Kid Who’s Way Too Young to See This Movie:  This isn’t to be confused with The Parent Who Couldn’t be Arsed to Get a Babysitter.  The PWTKWWTYTSTM takes youngsters to extremely gory, scary and violent movies and then ignores the child as it wails and begs to leave.

The Schmuck with the Phone:  TURN IT OFF, YOU SELFISH PRICK!

The Litterer:  While not really a nuisance to the average movie-goer, the Litterer is the one responsible for the sticky floor and the half-empty tub of popcorn you step in on your way out.

The Mouth-Breather:  Usually sitting beside you or directly behind you, you can hear his moist inhalations any time there’s a quiet scene.

The Kicker:  Often a child, but not always, the Kicker is the one that always sits behind you.

The Predictor (or Dionne Warwick):  That one asshole who blabs early and often about how the movie’s going to end.  Usually encountered in movies with twist endings which you have valiantly avoided thus far.

For every good Asian movie, there are 5,134 bad ones. Here are a few of the sucktastic ones I’ve seen.

Pulse: (sorry Joe) Asian horror movies are a dime a dozen, but this one was on the clearance rack. It made little sense. Normally, that’s not a problem as Asian horror is often hard to follow. This one made less sense than most. It had something to do with ghosts and forbidden doors that people put red tape around. If you went into the forbidden room, you’d die. Unless you were that one chick who managed to get out somehow.

St. John’s Wort: This movie was made to look like a video game, or is a video game, or was based on a game, or a game was based on it’s plot. Pick one, it doesn’t matter. It involved some kids wandering around an old house and then some stuff seemed like it was going to happen, but it didn’t. I made it all the way to the end of this one only because I thought there’s no way a movie can have absolutely no merit. I was wrong.

Infection: The best part of this movie was the color of the funky phone about 15 minutes into the movie. But what’s it about, you ask? Infection. Duh.

A Tale of Two Sisters: Again, the first hour or so, you watch it, waiting, knowing that something has to happen eventually. Right? No, sorry. Something about abuse, and an armoire. Pretty scenery but eminently forgettable and skippable.

Tomie: HOLY SHIT IT’S A HEAD IN A BAG! Other than that, I don’t remember anything about it.

Oh man, the teaser trailer for Spider-Man 3 is out, and after the lamenitude of X-Men 3 and Superman Returns, along with the fanboy loser wetdream that is Ghost Rider, the Spider-Man 3 trailer freakin rules.

Even the normally not-with-the-geek GAC squealed, or at least didn’t throw something.  Dude, she’s such a B—- sometimes…

But shes a hot b—-.

I’ve always been attracted to the unusual and bizarre. ‘Splains why I married AT. But I digress. No one does unusual and bizarre quite like the Asians. I’m bored today, and think you should be, too, so I’m going to share with you some of my favorites.

Happiness of the Katakuris - Director Takashi Miike normally does some pretty disgusting horror/action type films, so this comedy/musical/horror is a bit of change for him. A family tries desperately to make a living with a bed & breakfast, only to have a string of guests die in unusual circumstances. Complete with a Meatloaf-esque rock song. Bitchin.

Shark Skin Man and Peach Hip Girl - This one is perhaps a little less on the bizarre side. It’s more of a gangster/action type film. The acting is great, the plot is followable (which can be rare with Asian films) and the really, really weird hitman is a riot. Not a bad choice for the uninitiated.

Kwaidan - Weirdness isn’t a new trend for Asian films. This 1964 film is considered by many to be a masterpiece. Four seperate stories make up this movie, each one a little weirder than the last. They all have dream-like qualities to them, often with little dialogue and lots of beautiful scenery and color.

Samurai Fiction - Who doesn’t like samurai movies? This 1998 flick is a great homage to the samurai films of the 50’s and 60’s, but with a smattering of the Three Stooges.

Volcano High - A Korean film about a high school transfer student who begins a new school in the midst of a battle between various sports teams. I’d know more, but the lead guy is a hottie. Rowr. If you don’t like reading subtitles, Snoop Dog and various guests have dubbed this film. I have that version as well, but I haven’t ventured there quite yet.

That’s only a small sample of the Asian films we own. Recommendations are always welcome. Looking at you, Joe Powell.