Atomictumor

At approximately noon today, three neighborhood children who have played with MastaG for years when we lived in the former Casatuma went into the backyard, threw a rock through a plate of my double plated back doors, put a ladder to the roof, deposited a broom and a step stool that were on the back porch up there, and flattened my garbage can with a bike.

Their ages are 9, 6, and 5.

When I got to the house to do my normal checking it out and fixing some problems thing, I noticed the glass, and went off.  There was a pool of broken glass on the back porch, and a rock wedged between the standing inside plate and the broken outside one, with several rocks scattered around in the broken glass.

What bothered me more, tho, were the implications of these little bastards getting up on my roof, falling off, and breaking their stupid necks.

No, the door bothered me more.  Stupid assed kids.

So, anyway, I was on the phone with the lady explaining the situation and about to call the local 5-0 when I walked around back again and found the dad of one of the kids, the 6 yr old, who I’ve always figured to be a good kid, with good parents, standing out there.  He explained the situation to me.  We walked over to one of the other kids house, the 5 yr old, and talked to his dad.

Apparently the kids were playing in his yard (across the street from mine), and after a while he realized they weren’t there.  He heard them back behind my house, and heard the glass break, but when he got around back they scattered.

Anyway, he and the other dad are going to pay for the door.  The mom of the kid I suspect of throwing the rock, however, has a history of never believing that her little delinquent angel commits transgressions to anybody but her.  We’ve had issues before.  I don’t expect much out of her.

I’d love to throw the police on this, but I don’t care for police, and I don’t see any reason to get these two dads in trouble when I don’t believe their kids did any more than watch this older kid break crap.  Furthermore, their dads are PISSED, and I don’t see that the police would do much more good.

Still, the whole thing is bullshit.  These kids that knew my kids for years, kids that I’ve fed, kids that I’ve had playing at my house, are breaking my damn back door for no other reason than that I’m not there.  Little bastards.

Makes me want to get a tazer

—

That reminds me… if you’re still looking for that perfect christmas gift, may I offer a small suggestion?

Just imagine sitting in your deer stand with this ray gun.

The Army is looking at its Plasma Acoustic Shield System as a checkpoint defender, for now. But the original idea — and the long-term goal of the project — is to have it be the first baby step towards a portable, lethal laser weapon.

All that good old boy needs is a high powered scope. Wal*Mart has them.

I have found my first goal:

Send Pat Robertson messages.

We have the technology.

If all works right, he’ll be wearing a diaper and banging pots in the middle of Times Square by Labor Day.

Thats right, somebody gave the boys “Santa’s North Poles” for Christmas.  One of the best named items I’ve ever seen.

—

During the filming of this post, a random act of violence occurred.  We have captured images for posterity.  We warn you, they are graphic, and as such, we are only showing them after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »